Why Are You Apologizing To Me?

Fucking I know you didn’t give me breast cancer….I know, I know, its what we say when we don’t know what to say. I get it. We wish to express sympathy for those we are concerned about. Our loved ones. I’m guilty of apologizing for catastrophic life events out of my control as well.

For those of you keeping up with my #badboob….It & the other will be removed a week from today [sorry rightie, I sacrificed you in the name of cancer]….It’s been 34 days since my lump discovery….22 days I have lived with knowing I have five cancerous tumors growing in my left breast….

22 harrowing fucking days. Before the diagnosis I’d begun to feel off. Now knowing it’s cancer in my veins–I’m really freaking the fuck out. Never been one to complain about aches & pains & shit Usually pop and Advil and go on with life. Fucking cancer…..this pain in my neck….the pain in my shoulder….has the cancer spread….The fuck is it doing inside my body to my nervous system…Is the doctor going to be able to remove all the cancer in 7 days? Fuck you cancer! May you be blinded my jizz in the eye….you fucker.

Oh, I’m so sorry Tara. Ugh….I’ve begun replying with the ‘you didn’t give it to me’ bit ‘did you?’…Ha you fuckers don’t know how to reply. With a laugh, it’s an icebreaker.

Cancer is a bitch. For real. And don’t get me wrong, I’m usually at a loss for words and will apologize too. It’s what we do. Silly human phenomena.

To those reaching out to let me know you’re reading, absorbing and getting in touch with yourself~congratufuckinlations! I love it. I love you. Spread the word to your friends. I always thought the campaign ‘Save the tata’s’ was kinda of silly. It should be ‘Save the lives’….Thank you. xx

Ha, Wanna hear my thoughts on the phrase stay strong?



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