Like, I Can Literally Burst With Joy And Shit

All I can say is fucking wow…I’m humbled by this whole experience. Three write ups in the local papers from the successful show! Everything!! The fashion show last weekend. It was actually postponed from October ’16, I was sick af at the time. Ulcerative laryngitis and lifesaving emergency surgery just two weeks before, fucking infection after infection. #LifeAfterCancer was sucking a big fat hairy ass. I don’t like pubes too much, so I made much needed internal changes. It didn’t happen overnight and I’ll never stop looking forward to developing new connections. Then being selected to throw first pitch in Peace Pacer’s Annual Pink Game, a huge honor. 💞

I knew I needed to regain focus, develop my breathing {damn what a difference}, and began eating much better.

This time around at the show, I knew I was in control and I’m making this shit happen; I didn’t want to feel like that messy unkempt person that I felt like.

So I fully jumped into raising awareness about cancers, healthy eating tips, increasing daily activity, all that shit via here and fb. This is the type of information I obsessively searched for in those first few days of diagnosis. I needed to read real stories, from real women; profanities not needed. Just my flare. I also knew I was it the only one seaking real life blogs too based on message boards. 

I know I already told you guys how much the YMCA has transformed my mind, body, and soul…I feel fucking amazing! Like I could burst out of my body or someshit. Maybe I’ll transform into my true alien form along with the few O neg blood havers on this earth….🤔

Really. This time last year I was wallowing about on my bathroom floor for hours at a time, too weak to move a finger, an eye lid, the experience of the Macy’s / American Cancer Society Making Strides Against Breast Cancer #PinkTastic fashion show wasn’t even an inkling in my seriously deteriorated toxic-drug filled brain. 
I continued working during treatment, it was a  very slow loopy kinda work. My words made no sense. The screens were melting on me. It was rough.I did slow down; many weeks are a horrible nightmarish blur….I never stoped…Knew I couldn’t. It was brutal af. You guys know. I shared….probably to much shit. But there it is. And here I am! There it was. I couldn’t picture life after cancer. Life during cancer was the fucking worst. Your body no longer belongs to you. You are a number, in their system, categorized all neat and shit. Poked, sliced, stretched, internally cleansed, weak, mental, urinary and poop-shoot involuntary succumbs to the toxic chemo cocktail and becomes useless, your arms, hands…fucking lifeless.  

 I not only survived breast and all the heinous acts involved with, I came out an even better version of myself. A self with goals. Plans. Getting my act together again, brushing off the last of the rumble; thanks in part to The Pretty In Pink Foundation, Wake Radiology, Raleigh Plastic Surgery, and the Taylor Family YMCA. 💪🏼

I always knew I’d do something that made an impact. I’ve found it with the American Cancer Society!! Helping to head #Raliegh’s successful social media platforms for Making Strides Against Breast Cancer- Raleigh, NC – October 14, 2017 … & Relay for Life of Raleigh, NC – June 9/10 2017 makes me feel fulfilled.  💞 I’m seriously excited as fuck to see where this chapter takes me.

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